We have been living like landlubbers for the last three months now. Our trailer sits outside of the little barn in the yard and whispers to me, “Let us away! Let us go see the road again and find treasures out in this wide wide world.”
I swallow the lump in my throat and say, “Some other day, perhaps, I will venture out and be a gypsy once more.” Today I am homebound and that is what God has for me. But, oh, how I long to be traveling again; living small and living large all at once. There are states that I haven’t explored, battlefields unseen. Travel is a luscious flavor that I cannot scrape off of my tongue. The outside world calls to me but my place is here on tera firma.
To be still in my home surrounded by worldly things is a darling thing; a comfortable and restful thing. A good thing. I have four young boys. They need to have an anchor thrown, at least for now, and a safe place to be the little rapscallions they are. The yard is scattered with tonka trucks, wiffle balls and nerf bullets. The archery tackle is once again at good use. This is good. I know this is good. Being a normal (ish) mom at home with my children is good and I remind myself of this when I feel the south bound breeze breath its sultry breath across my face. I will not come away to see the world, but I so yearn for it.
We ate wonderful food, saw wonderful things and met wonderful people. We lived like gypsy kings and in a way I know many never will. Our children had an adventure, a year of adventure. We had marvelous times and horrendous ones too. We worked hard and played harder. But that was just a season and it has passed.
Now we are in November in our cottage in the woods, it will be a quiet year I think. One of recovery and discovery. The color here is brown and the ground sparkles in the still frigid mornings. Leaves are long since raked away and the world is dead for it’s season. We hunker down like little mice in our small, warm home.
I am asked if I am glad to be in a real home now and settled in. I smile and say, “Yes, very much.” It’s true, I am so glad to be here but there is a keen dream of the road in the corner of my heart. I am glad for the rest, for a place to lay my head at night. I am glad that my children are anchored. I am glad that Jack is fighting a very good fight and seems to be winning.
Wanderlust is intrinsic but contentment is better. Thank God for different seasons of life and for the challenge of striving for gratitude under every circumstance.